The Great Divides

PSA: We don’t have to agree to get along.

I don’t think I’ve ever seen such unrest in my adult life. There is so much coming at us in 2020 and we are all on edge and over just the last few days I’ve really seen us turn - on each other.

In SK, we’ve had our own provincial election. Masks made mandatory in public spaces. Vehement attention placed on the US election. Boarders continued to be closed.

So much of this is outside of our individual control, yet it is natural to want to grasp for control, of something, of anything.

Even if it’s another human being.

I have watched as people attack each other. “What kind of person are you” “You must be a racist if” “Only an idiot would” “You’re sick if you consider”

I’ve seen messages of unrest, upset and of outright divide. Because this or that has happened in the world, they are done, blocking and deleting people who don’t agree with them.

Are you serious you guys?

There are literally going to be no perfect choices in life. Wouldn’t it be grand though? Tell me the last time you had a perfect option laid out for you with no minor compromises. Tell me about the perfect person in your life who is a clone of your opinions. They like the same shoes, same songs, same hair cuts, same cars, same kids names, same food, same religion, same politics. No one on this earth is going to be just. like. you. Not your spouse, not your kid, not your best friend. Are you going to block them too?

Why have we resorted to splashing a label on an entire person because they believe in one imperfect choice more than the other?

If you want perfection and agreement with everyone you interact with, let me tell you - your circle is about to become very, very small. Which on the bright side, I guess it will be easy to adhere to keeping your social circle and Christmas gathering small.

I just want to throw this concept out there, that we do not have to agree on everything in order to be friends.

You believe masks will save us from Covid and return our lives to normal in the next 12 months?

I am still your friend.

You voted for the NDP in the provincial election?

I am still your friend.

You want Biden or Trump to win?

I actually don’t even care which one you want, I am still your friend.

Because here’s the thing folks… when we as individuals want to claw back our power – the power that is outside of our control in the above type of instances…

We can control being kind to each other. We can control uniting ourselves as fellow civilians going through the same global pandemic. We can control looking for the good, the things we do agree with in a person when a topic arises that we differ in opinion.

We need to wake up and realize that attacking another individual at this basic social level will only contribute to the outright mass disruption of our daily lives, let alone the ones occurring at an international level.

Choose love. Choose the good. For all the bad you seek to see in your fellow neighbour, there is something good about them. Find it. Find something you love about that blockhead.

Does she like dogs? Appreciate. Does he grow a fine green lawn? Appreciate. Find something, anything. Because let me tell you – attacking each other for our differences right now is going to do far more damage both to our society, and to your individual mental and emotional health.

I have friends who eat horrendous foods and don’t take care of themselves even after watching me go through cancer. I can’t believe it, but I love them anyway. I have friends who have cheated on their spouses when it was a complete deal breaker for me in my own marriage. I love them anyway.

It’s not like we don’t talk about these differences, because we do. We listen with the intent to understand, we kindly share our perspective, we show empathy when we lack understanding of their perspective. We agree to disagree. We cannot divide and only gather with those who are just like us… that my friends is how war is started.

I love so many people for so many more reasons than the ones we don’t agree on.

Because I choose to.

Just remember, you get to decide to, too.

About the Author:

Adelle is currently writing her first book, outlining her journey through life, toxic lessons, and most recently - her battle with cancer. She is a sugar-addict turned health-freak, avid hiker, horseback rider, and holistic healthcare advocate. Find out more at and follow her on all social platforms @adellerosalia

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